Anderson My husband, Ron, admits that he used to be jerk, but I discovered a secret formula that turned him into a loving husband: I started treating him like a VIP! Ron always wanted me to respect him, but I thought he had to earn it and I had to feel it, before I could do it.
We all know that yelling, nagging, and belittling are disrespectful and ineffective. Treat him like a king, and eventually, hopefully, he will begin to treat you like a queen. Instead of waiting for him earn your respect, behave respectfully and watch him grow into the man God designed him to be. About 25 years ago, our marriage was on the brink of divorce. I was controlling, critical and disrespectful so Ron was defensive and angry.
We were both Christians but neither of us was living a sprit-filled life. But through a series of miracles read my book, Avoiding the Greener Grass Syndrome , for the whole story we made a decision to rebuild our marriage. While trying to heal, we went to a Christian counselor who read Ephesians 5: Here are three of the ways I began to respect Ron: They are easy to remember because they spell out the goal -- to treat him like a V.
Respect him Verbally, Intellectually, and Physically. Verbally Cut out ok…cut back complaining and add in compliments. If you want to have a peaceful, happy marriage, learn the art of the compliment. Compliments are like magnets, and the more you compliment your husband the more he will be attracted to you. Begin to notice when he does it right and verbally encourage him by complimenting him at least once a day.
If you are having a hard time thinking of anything to admire, consider these categories: I hope we can do this for her, but if you want to wait, I trust your judgment. What should I tell the orthodontist? So appeal to his intelligence by asking him to help you solve a problem. Could you figure out a storage system for all the camping supplies? Request his help on spiritual matters too. Ask him to explain a passage of Scripture or ask him to pray for you when you are going through a difficult time.
If your husband is not the spiritual leader in your home, continue to pray for him and ask him if there is anything you are doing that is hindering his relationship with God. Write out your monthly expenses and ask him what other things should be cut out in order to buy his car. Let the facts speak for you. Physically Physically -- ask what he would like you to do and then, do it.
Find out what his top three needs are. I know it sounds simple, but each of us have different things that make us feel loved and appreciated. Be aware of your body language. You can communicate disrespect by rolling your eyes, crossing your arms, or slamming doors.
Reflect your new decision to respect your husband in your heart, mind, and body. Change your attitude and actions Respect is both a verb and a noun, an action and an attitude, so begin today to respect your husband in thought, word, and deed. He will be more willing and able to give you the love and affection you need if he is respected and admired.
When I began to respect my husband, he was skeptical at first. However as he saw that I was committed to my attitude adjustment, he began to treat me differently—lovingly.
Ask the Lord to strengthen you as you obey His word.