Should I do online dating? I have never had a boyfriend and have never been on a date. Currently I'm finishing up my undergrad and will be entering a Master program in the Fall. I think I'm fairly attractive and I do not have a super high standard. At my college, I do socialize and have a lot of friends but for some reasons, I don't know many guys and the ones I know are either already in a relationship or just not interested in me.
I've thought about online dating but I don't know if I'm too young for it, if my inexperience would put me in dangerous situations, etc. I've thought about joining paid sites such as match. However, I am still a student and my budget is limited. I'd greatly appreciate any advice anyone has for me. We dated for a while, broke up for a year, and got back together. We got engaged a few months ago. I can't think of a good reason not to give it a shot.
I'd say the success levels are about the same as meeting people offline. Put a little effort into your profile on OKC nice, flattering pictures of you engaged in a variety of fun activities, plus some concise, punchy, upbeat profile verbiage that shows you don't take yourself too seriously and prepare to be deluged with messages.
Strike up an online conversation with a few people who seem interesting and see how it goes. That would be the place to start, rather than a pay site. But, regardless--you are and will be on a college campus!!! Join fun clubs and organizations and go week after week if you're not doing so already.
That'll get you outside your circle of friends and into a larger population of possibly interesting and interested people. You are the ideal age for online dating! Most people online meeting places aren't out to kill you and eat you; but that said, do take some basic precautions: Meet up in public, let people you trust know where you are and when you are expected to be back, don't take rides from strangers or candy from guys in dark vans.
Don't put your address or phone number on the internet. Also, even if they did spam, if their profile looks interesting, what do you have to lose? Edating is a numbers game, like so many other things. My mom and I both met someone well, separate someones! Some good dates, some bad ones, some ludicrous ones, and one fantastic still going one: Don't lose your sanity or common sense, and always wear sunscreen.
If that's not what you're looking for, OKCupid is a good choice. Make a profile, and perhaps seek out a trusted and experienced friend to critique it.
When I've gone out on first online dates, I usually choose a low-key public place like a coffee shop or a park. Sometimes I will tell a friend where I'm going and give that friend my date's number, just in case.
Definitely get a girlfriend or three to be advisors and sound boards. It's good that you recognize you're inexperienced, now be sure and build a support network to help you. Give it a try! If your standards are too low, you will not have enough time to go on all the dates with all weirdos. I've been online dating for many years -- if you count success by finding marriage material before you're 30, I'm a failure.
But I have a load of really great non-romantic relationship that came through OKCupid; I've had some great romantic relationships that just didn't last and I've got a basketful of stories of weird dates that are great for amusing my friends.
I did meet a guy on Match and had a 2 year relationship with him before he cheated on me and dumped me. I'm certain he would have done the same if we'd met on OKCupid but I've been leery of Match since precisely because it's designed to funnel people right into exclusive relationships right off the bat as compared to OKC.
I have no experience at all in this world. But I assume you'll exercise common sense. And going online doesn't mean you walk away from your day-to-day.
It's all serendepity, on line and in person. I would tell the truth, completely -- otherwise your odds may be good, but the goods may be odd. I suggest starting with the free site because you might end up dating for a while and then getting tired of it. If you are on a paid site, you are often tied in and may end up paying when you no longer want an online presence. I'm around your age and did it just for fun, for something new, to get out of my comfort zone.
Went on a lot of good dates just use your best judgment, I was never in a dangerous situation , but eventually quit because I found it time-consuming and no longer felt the need.
Might as well try it! That was four years ago - now I'm married to the first guy I ever messaged online. That's not a typical story Anyway, I think you should give it a shot.
I took the advice everyone is giving you here, went on three or four dates with some perfectly nice people, and then met my current partner. A year and a half later, they asked me to marry them. Online dating can be really great. And yeah, I'm n'thing OKC!
Just be smart about who you meet and where. Everyones' experiences are different, but if you're a bit nervous I was! It's the actual offline stuff - where you meet them in person - that is where the truth really lies; some people just come across way differently in person than they do in email, so it is possible that you could have some good conversations with them in email but then when you meet in person they're boring and you feel like you want to gnaw your own leg off to escape.
But you can have boring dates like that with guys you get introduced to by your friends too. There were the guys I had blocked on OKCupid, right there on Match, same profile pics and everything. It can be enormously frustrating at times and I've found that the best thing to do when that happens is just deactivate for a while. Unlike many other sites, OKC has a permanent delete option and a disable option, which is the same thing except when you feel like it you can bring back your profile simply by logging in again.
Your inexperience won't put you in any more dangerous situations than you'd be in from meeting people at a club or wherever. Less, actually, since you probably won't be drunk when deciding who to meet from online.
I'd recommend OKC, which is much better designed than the other online dating sites and also seems to have higher quality of people on there i. Plenty of people are "serious" on there, and plenty of other people are only interested in casual stuff. This is also true for the paid sites, though. There was one asshole who I went on one very lackluster date with and then blocked, but then every time I moved to a new dating site I would run into him again.
But that's not so much a function of online dating so much as "that guy is an asshole playa. It ain't the bars' fault, it's that guy being a jerk.